- Run-off-the-mill but at least somewhat “serviceable” action scenes
|Yeah...there's nothing stealthy about this guy.|
- Incoherent, convoluted story with a tendency of over-exposition
- Bad casting choices and uncharismatic, boring characters
- The action is often shot way too up close and is too frantically edited
- It’s all style over substance, complete with obvious product placements and slow-mo overkill
- That unnecessary sequel bait, cliffhanger ending
|Seriously? They couldn't even hire an actual bald actor?|
- That moment when Agent 47 flatout steals a certain famous line from Watchmen.
|And since when does Agent 47 fight against superhumans?|
Hitman: Agent 47 is a movie that absolutely nobody asked for but that we got anyway.
Video game movie adaptations in general already have a really hard time getting made right and taken seriously, and Hitman: Agent 47 does absolutely nothing to improve that situation.
As you can already tell by the trailers, Agent 47 is a prime example of over the top action and style over substance. With a story and characters so bland and forgettable that they are almost invisible, it’s hard to even come up with any redeeming factors to justify watching this mess of a movie. And honestly, what do you expect, when the exact same writer of the first failed Hitman movie from 2007 was once again tasked to write this reboot that feels just as overblown and ridiculously dumb as before. It genuinely feels like the producers and directors of the movie have never played or even seen a single bit of the actual video game the character is based on. With Agent 47 constantly going all out guns blazing in slow-motion and fighting superhuman enemies, the makers of this generic action mess don’t have a single clue what Hitman is all about. It’s obvious that the Hitman character is just getting exploited in this movie to make for a nameless and characterless “hyper badass” to shoot other nameless and characterless bad guys – nothing more.
If you are one of the very few fans of the first Hitman movie, this might be your cup of tea. Otherwise, this is just as generic, overblown and forgettable as most action video game movies come. Just don’t watch it and rather be excited for the upcoming next Hitman game instead.
Final Verdict: 1 out of 10